Rachael Dickzen

I recently gave a a little presentation of "My Favorite Thomases" for a friend's virtual Renaissance Faire, giving a little information about a number of famous Tudor/Tudor-adjacent Thomases and ranking them somewhat arbitrarily for fun.

Here’s my final ranking and bullet points about why I put each Thomas in each place. Do you agree with my ranking? Or am I totally wrong? Who's your favorite? Who do you love to hate? I'd love to hear your thoughts on all this!

10. Thomas Wriothesley, 1st Earl of Southampton

- Served Henry VIII and Edward VI
- Pressured nobles into supporting Henry VIII’s annulment from Catherine of Aragon
- Became wealthy when the monasteries were dissolved, but was happy to persecute Protestants for Henry as well.
- Ambassador to Brussels.
- Friend and employee of Cromwell’s who later turned against him. Claimed Thomas Cromwell was indiscreet with the fact that Henry couldn’t consummate his marriage with Anna of Cleves, helping bring about Cromwell’s execution.
- Personally tortured protestant preacher Anne Askew when the constable of the Tower of London refused to do so. Bishop Stephen Gardiner ordered that she be tortured to testify against Queen Catherine Parr (this was illegal unless the king expressly ordered it and it was unthinkable to torture a woman). The constable flat out refused to do so. Thomas Wriothesley and Richard Rich (both members of the privy council) personally put her on the rack and turned the wheel when the constable of the Tower of London refused to do so. Askew refused to speak. When she was brought out to be burnt at the stake, she had to be carried, as the torture had dislocated her joints and she could not walk.
- Part of the plot to arrest Catherine Parr (Henry VIII’s last wife).
-Lord Chancellor at the time of Henry's death
- Best thing about him: His eyes are pretty in this one portrait?*

9. Thomas Howard, 3rd Duke of Norfolk

- An advisor to Henry VIII who had served his father previously. Involved in several military campaigns against Scotland and France. Also Lord Deputy of Ireland, Lord Admiral, and Lord Treasurer for Henry VIII’s household.
- Violently killed many of the Pilgrimage of Grace rebels (Catholics who wanted the monasteries restored) for Henry VIII in 1537.
- Uncle to both Anne Boleyn (Henry VIII’s second wife and mother of Elizabeth I) and Catherine Howard (Henry VIII’s fifth wife). Played a major role in bringing about both their marriages to Henry. He also served on the commission to investigate Anne and presided over Anne’s trial, in which a jury unanimously sentenced her to death.
- Noted political enemy of Cromwell. Helped bring him down in the aftermath of Henry’s failed marriage to Anna of Cleves.
- Became isolated politically in the late days of Henry’s final years as the Seymours grew in power. His eldest son pissed off everyone by assuming the royal arms of Edward the Confessor as his personal heraldry – both were sent to the Tower, his son was executed. Henry assented to Howard’s death.
- Barely survived Henry VIII (was imprisoned and sentenced to death, but Henry died before the sentence could be carried out). Remained imprisoned throughout the rule of Edward VI, released by Mary I who he served for a while in military matters.*
- Worst thing about him: Seemed to really like his wife Lady Elizabeth Stafford for a while, but he took his mistress and literally moved her into the house in 1527, so they lived apart after that. Lady Elizabeth alleged he took her jewels and apparel, locked her in her chamber, and physically abused her.
- One of very few people who actually served Henry VIII from his accession to his death.

8. Thomas Seymour, 1st Baron Seymour of Sudeley

- brother of Jane Seymour (third wife of Henry VIII and mother of Edward VI), made diplomat and ambassador to Brussels, and later, Lord High Admiral.
- Henry VIII seemed to openly dislike him, which is rather hilarious. - married the dowager queen Catherine Parr in secret only four months after Henry’s death, after his attempts to marry both Princess Mary and Elizabeth failed.
- Hit on his pregnant wife’s 14-year-old stepdaughter (Princess Elizabeth) so much that her reputation was nearly ruined. Reports indicate that Seymour’s “flirting” included tickling and slapping her butt as she lay in her bed, or coming into her room in his nightclothes. Catherine Parrr dismissed these reports from Elizabeth’s governess as just innocent fun for a while and joined in a few times (including one weird time where they attacked Elizabeth’s dress with scissors and cut holes in it?). She later became more concerned and sent Elizabeth away to live elsewhere.
- Tried to pressure the 9-year-old Edward VI into signing various bills that would benefit him. Later tried to kidnap his nephew Edward VI and in the process, killed one of Edward’s dogs. Afterward, he was convicted of treason and executed.
- If you’re familiar with Six, he’s who Catherine Parr is singing to at the end. They became “romantic friends” right before Henry VIII proposed to Catherine. Conveniently, Thomas was made ambassador to Brussels shortly thereafter.

7. Thomas Boleyn, 1st Earl of Wiltshire

-Ambassador to Low Countries and France, Briefly Lord Privy Seal
-father of Anne Boleyn. Very intelligent and capable man who married above his station to Elizabeth Howard.*
-Took great advantage of his daughter’s rise in favor and took on many roles in Henry VIII’s government. Often portrayed as the mastermind of her marriage with Thomas Howard, her uncle, but no actual evidence to support this.
-Served on the secret commission to investigate his daughter’s sexual misconduct and helped lead to her and George’s downfall.**
-Survived his daughter and son’s downfall, but was stripped of his offices and titles. Died three years later (two years after his wife), still in disgrace. His only surviving child Mary died in 1542.

Described by records at the time of Anne Boleyn’s trial as “a mean egotist and coward, and from motives of prudence had always disapproved of his daughter’s bold and violent courses. There was, therefore, no reason to fear that he would try to defend her.” Did not fight for his children’s survival at all (we have records of other of the condemned men’s families fighting tooth and nail for them, but there’s no sign that that Thomas did anything to try to save Anne or George).

6. Sir Thomas Elyot

- a writer and publisher, English scholar and diplomat, clerk of the Privy Council, high sheriff of Oxfordshire
- Member of Parliament, embassy for Henry VIII on several occasions
- Very relatable. He literally begged Thomas Cromwell not to send him as embassy to holy roman emperor Charles (to try to persuade him to support Henry’s annulment from Catherine of Aragon)
- Educated himself from the age of 12.
- Wrote books supporting education of women and on moral philosophy. He also wrote a dictionary and a eulogy of Anna of Cleves (Henry VIII’s fourth wife).
- one of the first proponents of the use of the English language for literary purposes
- Hans Holbein drew a very lovely picture of him.

5. Sir Thomas More
- Famous humanist/philosopher. Wrote Utopia (giving rise to a new fiction genre) and History of King Richard III. I’m not a huge fan of his because his history of king Richard iii was often very inaccurate and popularized the view of Richard as a hunchbacked murdering villain (and I raelly like Richard III).
- Gave his daughters the same classical education as his son, influencing other nobles to do the same.
- Henry’s secretary, personal advisor, and lord high chancellor
- Opposed the Reformation, burning six Protestants. Insulted Martin Luther via letter on Henry VIII’s behalf.
- His stubbornness led not only to his own death but to his family’s poverty (those convicted and executed of treason lost all their lands and goods).
- Refused to take the Oath of Supremacy acknowledging the annulment of Henry & Catherine’s marriage and Henry as head of the English church, despite his family’s entreaties.
- Frankly brilliantly argued against his conviction at trial. One who keeps silent seems to consent", understood that he could not be convicted as long as he did not explicitly deny that the King was Supreme Head of the Church, and he therefore refused to answer all questions regarding his opinions on the subject. The evidence again him was pretty weak. The jury only took 15 minutes to convict him (probably had been ordered by Henry)
- Joked upon his death-"I pray you, master Lieutenant, see me safe up and [for] my coming down, let me shift for my self.” He may also have joked about his beard being innocent of any crime, and then positioned his beard so it would not be harmed upon his beheading.
- Canonized martyr and patron saint of statesmen/politicians

4. Thomas Stanley, 1st Earl of Derby

- With his brother, he managed to stay in the favor with every king during the Wars of the Roses, serving Henry VI, Edward IV, and Richard III.
- The Stanleys were slightly notorious for keeping their armies back out of battles until they were sure who would win, and then backing that person.
- Married Lady Margaret Beaufort and helped her bring her son Henry Tudor to the throne as Henry VII by supporting his armies at the Battle of Bosworth, even though Richard III held his son George (Lord Strange).
- Derided as a coward at times but honestly, one of the canniest people during the Wars of the Roses and a born survivor.

3. Thomas Cromwell, 1st Earl of Essex

- A blacksmith’s son and former mercenary/ “ruffian” in France, Italy, and the Netherlands.
- Became an attorney, a burgess in the House of Commons, and Cardinal Wolsey’s protégé.
- Talked the House of Commons into making Henry the head of the English Church and led the dissolution of the monasteries (which made Henry very rich). Named Henry’s chief minister in 1534.
- Likely manufactured the downfall of Anne Boleyn. Definitely manufactured the dissolution of the monasteries throughout England in the wake of England leaving the Roman Catholic Church. Anne wanted money from the dissolution of the monasteries to go to education instead of the king, which Cromwell preferred.
- Reformed the council of the North to strengthen royal authority there, introduced Protestantism in Ireland, wrote laws which promoted stability in Wales. He also introduced significant social reforms, including poor relief legislation, the promotion of English cloth exports, and taking action against enclosures.
- Arranged Henry’s marriage to Anna of Cleves, from the Duchy of Cleves, a Protestant stronghold. When this didn’t pan out, Henry was pushed by Cromwell’s enemies (including the aforementioned Thomas Wriothesley) to have him executed.
- The only person Henry VIII openly regretted executing.
- Historians <3 him because he ordered all parishes to record all christenings, marriages, and burials.
- I’m biased in his favor because of his effect on the keeping of historical records.

2. Cardinal Thomas Wolsey

-A butcher’s son who ran the kingdom for Henry VIII, serving as his Lord High Chancellor from 1515-1529.
-Made significant and popular legal reforms that allowed nobles to be convicted of crimes.
- Despite being a priest, had a mistress and two children.
- Gave Hampton Court Palace to Henry as a peace offering when Henry was angry at how long his annulment was taking.
- Fell from power after the Legatine Court kicked the can down the road on Henry VIII’s annulment from Catherine of Aragon.
- Extremely unpopular among nobles because of his commoner status and his power. Wolsey was terribly corrupt and got lots of money from his position, but frankly, everyone else did.
- Liked cats so much that his cat features in his statue.
- Sam Neill played him in the Tudors. And I really like Sam Neil.
- He died of illness on his journey to London to answer to charges of treason.

1. Archbishop Thomas Cranmer

- I love Cranmer because he was ahead of his time in many ways, but smart enough and human enough to be flexible and compromise to keep himself alive, as he realized that he could do more for his faith by staying alive than by dying. He actually forgave other people who had done him wrong and personally stuck out his neck to try to protect several condemned people from Henry’s wrath.
- Scholar, Ambassador, Privy Councillor.
- helped build case for Henry's annulment. Traveled around to gather support for the plan. Officiated Henry and Anne’s wedding, pronounced his first marriage invalid, second valid.
- established the doctrine and Book of Common Prayer for the Church of England.
- One of the few people Henry seemed to genuinely love/trust. Begged mercy for Anne Boleyn and Thomas Cromwell. Henry VIII really loved Cranmer and personally sponsored the papal bulls necessary to promote Cranmer to archbishop of Canterbury. He also was deputized to be the person to tell Henry VIII that Catherine Howard was cheating on him, as Henry liked him best. He slipped the message to Henry during mass on All Saints Day.
In the last years of Henry’s reign, when conservatives tried to come after many religious reformers, including Cranmer, Henry himself told Cranmer about the charges and made Cranmer the chief investigator of the matter. Henry gave Cranmer his personal ring to show to anyone who tried to arrest him. Cranmer took initial revenge on the plotters against him but eventually forgave him (which was really rare for the time).
- Genuinely mourned Henry’s death and then grew a beard to mourn the king and reject the old church (continental reformers grew beards to mark their rejection of the old Church and this significance of clerical beards was well understood in England).
- Reformed the church considerably under Edward VI, changing doctrine on the Eucharist, clerical celibacy, veneration of saints, and the role of images in places of worship.
- Imprisoned when Mary I came to power. Over the two years of his imprisonment, recanted a few times and reconciled with the Catholic church, but on the day of his execution, withdrew his recantations to die a heretic.
- Married twice despite being in the church. First, while pursuing his MA, and had to forfeit his fellowship as a result. Later married a Protestant woman he met in Germany (instead of just taking her as a mistress as many priests did) in hopes that Henry would get rid of clerical celibacy and brought her to England in a box. Had two children with her. His family moved to continental Europe when it became clear that Henry wasn’t going to do this.